Top 10 Classic James Bond Gadgets

So, Bond is back.  Good times are fast approaching as we all await Skyfall with giddy child-like anticipation.  I am a fan, as many reading this blog probably are, and I am psyched about it.  So to commence my contribution to the build up to Bond, after all we all love the hype, lets look at some tech.

Bond gadgets are a major feature, a necessary component and an entertainingly intriguing element of all Classic Bond films.  From Dr No to Quantum of Solace, Bond movie gadgets have delighted, provoked and delivered technological coolness with every instalment, something Bond is all about.  It is therefore obvious to note that Classic Bond gadgets are the mutts nuts, here’s why!

10.  TV Wristwatch – Octopussy – 1983 – Roger Moore

So, I know it’s not a car phone or a spy pager or a ghetto blaster/rocket launcher, but, it is a nice start, the TV Wristwatch from Octopussy.  This film was so sexually charged that it comes as no surprise that this device should appear in this film.  Take a look at this…

That (above) is how James Bond tests the device, a device which in technology terms was a pretty cool offering for a Bond movie regardless of where it could have appeared.  This little device, with its numerous uses, however perverted those uses may become makes it in at number 10 because of its curious and charming yet dated and sexist attitude.  It’s the watch that says, “Hey, I can tell the time, but, I can also do this.”  I like that cheeky attitude and I like this Bond gadget.

9.  The Dagger Shoe – From Russia With Love – 1963 – Sean Connery

Too crap to be left out, ladies and gentlemen, it’s the Dagger Shoe.  A low for Bond tech, but because it’s a knife shoe, and sometimes there is a situation that might warrant a dagger emerging from the end of your toe so you can kill a mo fo, the dagger shoe scrapes its way into the list.

8.  X-Ray Glasses – The World is Not Enough – 1999 – Pierce Brosnan

This was an easy one.  Ever since I was a kid I wanted a pair of X-Ray Specs.  That’s cereal box cool and trust James Bond to have a pair.  Lucky bastard.

Bond in action wearing the X-Ray Specs! Nice one Bond.

7.  Oddjobs Steel Brimmed Hat – Goldfinger – 1964 – Sean Connery

The thing about this entrant to the gadget list is that it ain’t that much of a gadget.  It’s a steel brimmed bowler hat, it belongs to a portly Bond villain named Oddjob.  It is used to cut peoples heads off.  Killer gadget.

I decided that this is a worthy gadget, for inclusion after watching the Gadget show recently and in that episode they featured frisbees.  So, I decided that if a Frisbee is good enough for the Gadget Show then, Oddjobs Hat is good enough for this blog, rock on Oddjob you murderous bastard.

To read my opinion on this gadget in further detail, click here

6.  Yo-Yo Saw – Octopussy – 1983 – Roger Moore

Then, in true Bond villain fashion, there is this…The Yo-Yo Saw.  It’s a saw, that works like a yo-yo.  Caution, this gadget weapon is only to be used by the most sneaky and dastardly of villain types, therefore if you look any less dastardly and sneaky than the guy in this snapshot, then its probably not the weapon of choice for you.  Its uniqueness makes it special.  And deadly. Yo-Yo Saw.

5.  Rolex Submariner – Live and Let Die – 1973 – Roger Moore

The Rolex Submariner, as mentioned by me in a previous blog titled – I want One – is…

“Mmmm, butter fo yo wrist.  This model is just B.E.A.Utiful and its equipped with a powerful electromagnet that deflects bullets and undresses the ladies and a spinning bezel that acts as a cutting disk, useful for when you have a damsel in distress to save and your tied up with rope.  Sexy, elegant and multi functional, one can actually own one similar to this for around $12, 950.00.”

Study the following pictures to understand the importance of owning an item such as this…

Having a difficult Monday like James in the picture above?  Got a Bond girl tied to you, while you’re suspended above shark infested water?  Has some psycho left you to die, again?  Well worry not, for if you have one of these…

Once the spinning bezel cuts your ropes you can do this…

…and then get back to doing this…

Yeah…The Rolex Submariner!!

4. Lotus Espirit – The Spy Who Loved Me – 1977 – Roger Moore

This car is just awesome, and one that made it through the movie. Well played you sneaky underwater driving sexy beast you. Just look at it, tell me you don’t think this is fricken decadence and genius all in one sleek, nimble, flashy and battle ready vehicle. You can’t because it’s nice, yes?

It can also do this…

It also has all of this… Machine Guns. Torpedoes. Landmines. Lasers. Rockets. Skis. So, it might not be an Aston Martin or a BMW but this formidable Lotus, makes it into my list any day.

3.  Golden Gun – The Man with the Golden Gun – 1974 – Roger Moore

This is a great picture of the gadget gun that wins a place in every fans heart. This is the Golden Gun, popular choice for Christopher Lee and if it’s good enough for that screen legend then it’s good enough for me. Ingenious in its design and laughable in its decadent style, the golden gun is luxury killing at its best. Gotta save up for them bullets though, expensive shootings. Make it count. Pen… Lighter… Cigarette Case… Bullet… Gadget awesome.

2.  Little Nellie – You Only Live Twice – 1967 – Sean Connery

This is a guilty pleasure, the autogyro from You Only Live Twice.  Imagine the thrill when out in Little Nellie, imagine the laughs you could have with this if you just so happened to be James Bond, a suaver version of the Red Barron.  Do it in one of these.  Made in Britain in 1961, or thereabouts this particular winged wonder comes armed to the teeth with rockets, machine guns, flame throwers, heat seeking missiles and aerial mines.  P.A.R.T.Y.

Bond: “Q, this thing, it looks like you knocked it together in your garage using toilet roll tubes.”
Q: “Fuck you Bond.”

When you are up this high, in this dinky machine, you better not need a crap.

1.  The Jet Pack – Thunderball – 1965 – Sean Connery

Goddam I would LOVE one of these.  Cool Bond Connery representing some Rocketeer skills.  This is the essence of the Bond-ness that I relish when I re-watch old Bond classics.  Stuff like this sets the standard for espionage excellence.  This is casual, effortless scientific application and this is the science bit of Bond that appeals to everyone.  I mean, this is a Bond gadget that despite numerous seriously well funded projects, all advancing the application of the gadget safely and effectively and consistently on all counts, has yet to be fully and safely realised.  But, James had one.  Naturally.  A convenience that makes our British warrior elite second to none.  Blast off bitches…

Enjoy some of these videos, I did: FilmfellaJames.

http://movies.mtv.co.uk/videos/bond-50-bonds-gadgets/dt8583

About filmfellajames
Film critic and blogger, part time rap master, loves UNITED!!!

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